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Mullahs on the Moon

By Nadir Hassan 20 September 2009 5 Comments

full-moon-2

Displaying the unity of purpose that has made this country what it is today, Pakistan will be celebrating Eid on two different days. In parts of the NWFP, the first day of Eid is already winding down; the rest of the country will binge on rice-and-milk-based desserts tomorrow.

The idealists among you might want the entire country to observe Eid on the same day. But not if that means we go against Saudi Arabia, says Minister of Railways Ghulam Ahmed Bilour. Bilour is a member of the ANP and decided to burnish his party’s secular credentials by kowtowing to the Saudis. He had a further word of warning for those defying the Saudis:

He was of the view it was a grave sin to fast on Eid Day, adding those who observed fasting on Sunday they were on the side of Qadianiat.

While Bilour and the rest of the ANP was supportive of a Sunday Eid, Mufti Muneeb-ur-Rehman, the chairman of the Central Ruet-e-Hilal Committee, truly had the pulse of the NWFP. Here is what he had to say:

[H]e said he is receiving phones from the NWFP people who said weepingly that their ibadat has been ruined…

If you can get the image of weeping Pathan men out of your brain, keep in mind that, as we were reminded by Ghulam Ahmed Bilour’s brother Bashir, this is not a religious matter; it’s a provincial one:

Bashir urged Chairman Ruet Committee Muneeb to prove himself as the chairman of the entire country not just Punjab.

It might seem logical to rely on science, rather than mullahs and politicians, to spot the moon. Alternately, you could literally blind yourselves, which is what the PPP’s information secretary Fozia Wahab seems to be suggesting:

Fozia criticizes Peshawar moon sighting

Nadir Hassan is a Pakistan-based journalist who worked as a senior assistant editor at Newsline.

Find more articles by Nadir Hassan

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5 Comments »

A. said:

hahaha. Love the post

# 20 September 2009 at 9:15 am

MD said:

whats wrong with two eids, in fact we should have 3 and 9 days of Holy-day, day by day this country is turning into a Moronistan. i think Pulp sang that song for this country, Mullahs are Everywhere, oh shit i just commit a blasphemy.

# 20 September 2009 at 11:35 pm

The Eid that must not be declared « erase and rewind said:

[...] Hassan at Newsline magazine’s blog (they have a great new website) blogged about the rather inane statements given during the moon debacle and Mohammed Hanif’s acerbic take on it for BBC Urdu is a must-read: حضرت نے [...]

# 20 September 2009 at 11:37 pm

Rabia said:

is it some kind of job requirement for the federal minister of railways to talk absolute crap all the time? first sheikh rashid, now this guy. unbelivable.

# 21 September 2009 at 12:47 pm

Nadir Hassan (author) said:

Rabia: Sheikh Rashid surely talked crap, but at least he did it with a sense of humour and was never as nasty as Bilour was with these remarks. It is true, however, that our railways ministers feel the need to sound off on issues that are frankly none of their business. Maybe they are unsatisfied with their jobs and dream of higher positions?

# 21 September 2009 at 2:32 pm